For anyone struggling to forgive and wanting to seek revenge.
Let go. Shift your focus. Forgive and move on. Leave that person to the Lord to deal with, and trust that God has you, will always have you, and that His justice is on His timetable and not yours. Trust me, the Lord will always vindicate His people.
Rest knowing that. 🫶🏼
Just the messenger. 💌
Sweet Dreams. ✨️
Becoming a widow in 2020 at just 29 years old shocked me to my core. Brought me to my knees in disbelief. To lose someone you were with for 15 years to murder, unexpectedly, was devastating, to say the least.
Because of his popularity, impact, and the circumstances surrounding his death, I opted to grieve and honor his legacy privately. I opted not to publicly disclose any details, nor speak about his murder out of respect for his family, my mental stability, and most importantly, him.
You see, when you’re with someone for that long, on bad terms or not, your loyalty and love run thick. Well, it should. I used to feel guilty and awful about privately remembering and honoring him. But I don’t anymore. As I began to heal, I learned that I could grieve and remember him privately and in a sacred regard. Without the eyes of social media or the news / blogs asking for an interview. I learned that it is okay to protect and tuck myself into a safe place to grieve.
Quite honestly, after almost three years, some days, it’s still too painful to bear. It’s still too raw and emotionally challenging to comprehend. This year is particularly rough because he would be graduating from law school (University of Michigan Law) and getting ready to enter into a new exciting chapter. But that’s not reality-based anymore. He transitioned to be with our Holy Father and is resting peacefully. He earned that.
As I painfully yet ambitiously move through my journey of grief, there is one component in particular that has been my saving grace, Untangle Grief.
Untangle Grief is a community, a family of grievers who support each other, uplift each other, inspire each other, and often time pick each other up. It’s a safe space to expose your grief wounds, let out your sadness, and encourage the people walking the same journey as you.
Untangle Grief has been many times my lifeline. With this community, I’m learning how to carry the grief and not let it consume me. I’m learning that it is okay not to be okay. Most importantly, I’m learning that I’m not alone in my bereavement. That, that is what keeps me going.
Join us. Join us as we lift, encourage, support, and inspire one another. You are not alone, and neither am I.
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=uk.co.disciplemedia.untangle
P.s.: If you can’t take things day by day, try taking it moment by moment. ❤️🩹 Either way, try.
Brooklyn Michelle Watson. My baby girl. My princess. My daughter. She also has seen me through the death of her pet Dad, a failed suicide attempt, a blindsided break-up and new beginnings. You started the game. You taught your little brother Carter the ropes even though he’s a dog. So many times I wanted to throw in the towel but I saw this precious face. Thank you for giving me a reason to live. 🙌🏼
Friday nights with Carter and I annoy you but you know us. 🫠🫶🏼😂
P.s.: Brooklyn is a 13 year old Domestic Short-haired Calico. 🐈
Carter Max Watson. My right hand man. My coolie-bop. My son. He’s literally seen me through the death of his pet Dad, a failed suicide attempt, a blindsided break-up, rebuilding and rebuilding again. Literally the most loyal in my life for over 12 years. When I wanted to give up I couldn’t because I have you. 🙌🏼
Friday nights with you are priceless. Dogs, we don’t deserve them. 🫶🏼
P.s.: Carter is a 12 year old Jack Russell Terrier and Whippet. 🐕
Thursday Re-Cap:
🫠 Random dream about the rapper Gunna.
😭 Left work early, major grief melt-down.
👑 Momma talked me off the ledge.
😋 Ate homemade chili in my HRC mug.
🤮 Dog puked and tried to eat it.
🥰 Watched Chicago P.D.
🙌🏼 Spent quality time with God.
Father God, continue to heal me. Continue to allow me to sit with these uncomfortable emotions, have these difficult conversations and sort through these painful feelings. Continue to force me to sit in my grief and loss because I ran from it for far too long. Continue to use my solitude for my healing. And Father, continue to use me to serve, inspire and help your people. May your will and only your will manifest and be done.
In Jesus’s sovereign, righteous and holy name, Amen.
March 8th 2022 vs. March 8th 2023
In love, God will often remove unhealthy things and people from our lives when we are too weak, too attached, or too blinded to see correctly. God makes the decision for us when we were not going to make the correct choice freely on our own.
My Momma Said: “Be careful who you decide to hurt. Plot twist, God acts on their behalf.” 🫠
Do not touch my anointed ones; do my prophets no harm. Psalms 105:15 NIV 🫶🏼
Happy Mother’s Day to the realest one on my team. Ten toes down no matter what. You told me I could survive and continue living without my late husband and be successful on my own. Never forgetting the mark he left but becoming my own woman. You told me it was okay to grieve, remember and honor him privately because none of that has to be done for the audience of social media. That my complicated grief and remembrance could be private and sacred.
You told me out of love that last little relationship wasn’t going to work because you can’t love people into their potential, they have to want it for themselves. You told me when someone shows you who they are believe them and don’t try to gaslight myself into believing differently. His loss.
You told me you admired my calling to serve other people but, to not set myself on fire to keep other people warm. You gave me your strength, many times when you had none for yourself.
You taught me the true meaning of “it is what it is”. You taught me the true meaning of “cry, then boss up”. You taught me that this world doesn’t owe me anything, but I owe myself everything.
You made me want to live again.
Happy Mother’s Day. Because with you, you deserve to be celebrated all days. I love you more than anything, even LaRoyce Hawkins. 🫶🏼♥️🎀
When I look back at my life, I am so thankful that God brought me out of many situations that would have only resulted in my destruction had I stayed there. I was too afraid to take action, so God acted on my behalf. God protected me from myself and others. Protection I was too blind to even see I needed.
In the moments of having to leave behind people, possessions, and relationships we hold close and dear to us, may seem like the most challenging thing to do. But in reality, those heartbreaking moments make room for our healing.
When you put your trust in the One who knows best; the present pain will eventually turn into the greatest gain in life. With God giving you back something you never knew you had lost, yourself.
